The holidays turn me into an overly affectionate sequined creep.
The moment I try to avoid every year happened this morning. I got in the holiday spirit. For normal people, this wouldn’t be that upsetting, but I’m a holiday love addict. I become overly affectionate and I need about 100 hugs a day just so I don’t get the shakes. I fall in love with pretty much anything and anyone that walks by me, and I have a deep need to snuggle in flannel. This morning I heard “All I Want For Christmas” on the radio and I knew no one was safe from now until the day after Christmas. I will now start telling everyone that comes in my path that I love them and that I am thankful for them.
Even the cashier at Dahls.
I can’t stop myself. It’s like I have verbal love vomit and no amount of Tylenol PM can cure it.
I’m not sure who to blame for this illness, but I think I’ll blame my mom for making me think sequins are the only acceptable holiday attire and my dad for letting me think it’s okay to drink the entire jug of egg nog in one sitting. I also tend to go a little broke during the holidays because I buy strangers coffee at Starbucks when I’m in the drive through. Then I tell them to “Pass the cheer.” I’m that person.
And worst of all, I make all my pets wear matching Christmas sweaters even if they don’t like it.
Someone help me.